While checking out colleges my senior year of high school (ah, the glory days!), I remember our student tour guides pointing out all sorts of well-known spots on various campus. Some were known for their rare books collection, others for their top-notch laboratories, and a few for their, um, popularity amongst frisky undergrads. At the University of Pennsylvania, for instance, there’s a giant button-like sculpture, and — as my tour guide claimed — students often made it a mission to have sex there at least once before graduating. Did they have a secret book of tips for having sex outdoors (and never getting caught)? They must have.
As anyone who’s attempted to bang in the great outdoors can tell you, it’s no easy task. Sure, the idea of getting it on at the beach, in a swimming pool, or on your university’s quad sounds sexy. In theory. But the experience is often foiled by sand sneaking into incredibly uncomfortable places, grass burn, and panicking that someone is about to catch you.
There’s also the issue of legality: If you and your partner choose a public spot to indulge in your outdoor sexual fantasies, it might land you with a hefty fine and maybe even jail time (yikes!).
“While squelching your pleasure isn’t ideal, it’s imperative to keep quiet if you don’t want to get arrested,” explains Amy Levine, sex coach and founder of Ignite Your Pleasure. “Part of the thrill is the risk of getting caught, so choose a spot that’s ‘public,’ but not obvious. Better that it’s more of a fantasy rather than actually getting busted.”
There is something undeniably sexy about the thought of having sex in an unexpected space, right? To help you pull it off, I chatted with a few sexperts — including Levine and adult film star Stirling Cooper. Here are their top tips for having great, enjoyable, and discreet sexual escapade (sexcapades, if you will) in a couple of outdoor spots.
On The Beach
Beyond being a delicious spring break cocktail, sex on the beach is also a pretty common fantasy for, well, pretty much everyone. And it’s definitely a high-risk, high-reward situation. Yes, it’s romantic. But it’s also very sandy, very public, and therefore, very easy to get caught.
“If you’re going to have sex on the beach, then head for the sand dunes,” suggests Cooper. “They rise and dip so much, and are typically covered in bushes, [so] you’ll be able to find a place to have some fun in private without getting caught.”
If you’ve managed to find a semi-private spot for your romp in the hay (or in the dunes, rather), opt for moves in which the receiving partner is on top, to reduce the chance that you’ll get sand in all the wrong places.
“Don’t go for any position where [the receiving partner] is laying on [their] back (missionary or spoon) because that’s a guaranteed way to get sand in a rather uncomfortable place…” says Cooper. Most of these woman-on-top sex moves should do the trick.
In A Pool
Depending on where the pool’s located, there are a couple of obstacles you might encounter — like nosy neighbors or poor lubrication (full disclosure: you’ll be all the wrong kinds of wet). But don’t worry, there are easy fixes.
“If you’re doing it in your backyard pool and don’t want to draw too much attention from the neighbors, then avoid penetration right on the surface of the water, because this will make the most noise,” explains Cooper. “However, the splashing onto [your] clit can make for a good extra sensation, if you don’t really care about noise that much.”
Regardless of whether or not noise is an issue, remember that your body will have a hard time moistening up if you’re already in a wet environment (one of the many reasons why shower sex is impossible). “Water can be very drying to vaginal lubrication,” explains Levine. For that reason, make sure you’ve got some lube poolside. Something silicone-based, like Wicked Ultra Silicone Lubricant, will help reduce friction and irritation.
I should also note that it can be very tricky to successfully use a condom while having sex in a pool, so I wouldn’t recommend doing any of the above unless you’re in a monogamous relationship (and have both been tested for STDs).
In A Grassy Area (Or The Forest)
If you and your partner are the hiking type — or have just always dreamt of rolling around together on your high school football field — we’ve got you covered, too.
“If you’re walking in the woods and just can’t keep your hands off each other, then make the most of the trees around you and duck behind one for cover, whilst also using one [as support] for doggy style,” says Cooper.
Let’s say there aren’t any trees around for cover; what then? Levine suggests opting for some lower key moves (doggy style is shockingly useful for outdoor sex, you guys).
“[Try] anything that’s discreet and looks more like your bodies are close rather than obviously going at it,” she says. “Doggy style versus Cirque de Soleil moves.”
Feeling ready for an outdoor sexual adventure? Go forth and conquer, y’all.
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